The Rainbow Comes and Goes: A Mother and Son on Life, Love, and Loss

Nonfiction | Autobiography / Memoir | Adult | Published in 2016

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Summary

Background

Chapter Summaries & Analyses

Introduction-Chapter 1

Chapters 2-3

Chapters 4-5

Chapter 6-Epilogue

Key Figures

Themes

Symbols & Motifs

Important Quotes

Essay Topics

Tools

Beta

Discussion Questions

Symbols & Motifs

Photographs and Portraits

Photographs and portraits symbolize those Gloria Vanderbilt has lost in her life and the fact that they have remained with her after their deaths. In addition to this symbolism, photographs and portraits act as motifs that show Vanderbilt steadily undergoing a Healing From Loss. In her childhood years, the only trace of her dead father that she had was the photograph of him holding her shortly after her birth. Vanderbilt initially lamented that seeing his photograph was the only way to be with him.

As Vanderbilt grew older, however, the photographs of her deceased loved ones became comforts for her. After her high school boyfriend John Delehanty died in a car accident, she mourned him and then moved forward but kept his photograph. Her possession of his photograph even at the time of the memoir reflects that she still values the love and the memories they shared. Similarly, following her mother’s death, Vanderbilt kept her portrait, which reminds her of the beautiful woman she once envied as a child and makes her feel more loved than she ever did when her mother was alive. She also kept photographs of Dodo, the mother figure who always supported her and never stopped loving her. The photographs reflect how even though Vanderbilt was not with Dodo when she died, Dodo is always with her.

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The photographs in Cooper’s drawer are also symbols of the memories he holds. However, unlike Vanderbilt, he does not revisit those photographs or their surrounding memories. This reflects Cooper’s interest in focusing on the present and future, making plans for what is to come rather than thinking too much about the past.

The Tree

The tree that the man wants in the E. B. White story, which Vanderbilt mentions and quotes, “exists only in the moment that he’s seen it, and represents the idea of never being satisfied” (176). Vanderbilt uses this symbol as a motif to connect to her restlessness and insatiability. The tree reflects not only the man in the story being unable to obtain long-term contentment but also Vanderbilt being unable to do so following her father’s death. Though the tree only appears briefly, Vanderbilt uses this symbol and motif to demonstrate how she was looking for a happiness that appeared to evade her, leading her to go from relationship to relationship until she met Wyatt Cooper.

The Dragon

The dragon Vanderbilt mentions and describes in her letter to her younger self symbolizes her insecurity and fear, as well as her mother. Early in the letter, she describes the dragon as lying “in wait” since the time that Vanderbilt lived in Paris and listened to Dodo and Naney talk (266). This establishes that her fear of her mother was largely created by Dodo’s and Naney’s manipulations of her and her attachment to the two of them, rather than her mother. She then tells her younger self that she had spent her life trying to slay the dragon—in other words, the emotional abandonment and fear of her mother both before and during the custody battle. Vanderbilt tried to remove her fear and grief by pursuing strong men who she believed would love her, and by distancing herself from her mother. Vanderbilt writes that she made the dragon her friend and that her younger self can as well. In this way, the dragon also symbolizes the fear and insecurity she felt following the death of her father; befriending the dragon means developing her own understanding and personal acceptance of the situation. Her note highlights how she addressed this pain by surrounding herself with those who loved her and building the life she wanted through family and art. She overcame her fear of and the complicated feelings around her mother by reconciling with and forgiving her for her and others’ mistakes. Vanderbilt wants her younger self to befriend and make peace with the dragon, which means focusing on her own desires and making peace with her family and the past.

The Rainbow

The rainbow is a symbol of good times, happiness, and beauty, as well as a motif supporting Healing From Loss. Vanderbilt uses the William Wordsworth line “The rainbow comes and goes” from his poem “Ode: Intimations of Immortality From Recollections of Early Childhood” to describe the cyclical nature of good times and bad times (272). She explains, “In every life, you have moments of blinding beauty and happiness, and then you land in a dark cave and there is no color, no sky. Then the rainbow returns, sometimes only briefly, but it always does come back” (273).

Cooper and Vanderbilt both agree that good times, like the rainbow, are not always there or always visible, and knowing that helps them accept the world and deal with difficult situations. However, they have differing attitudes and perspectives on the rainbow. Cooper says that he likes to be prepared and able to survive in the darkness if the rainbow never returns, reflecting his desire to accept pain and loss objectively and not wait for things to improve when they might not. In contrast, Vanderbilt believes that the rainbow always returns and that it is important to believe good things will come again in one’s life.